Thursday, August 23, 2012

The Wear and Tear on My Family

Well, it's been a pretty good week for exercise and calorie counting. I've managed to get in a couple great workouts. Monday night I worked an hour on the elliptical, followed by 30 minutes on the recumbent bike plus 20 minutes for dumbbell work on my arms. Last night, I took a 12 mile bike ride, and tonight I managed to run 3.1 miles and bike a little over 6 miles. Yay!

I've been pushing pretty hard lately because I'm just a few pounds away from leaving the 200s behind me FOREVER. I'm creating a significant calorie deficit, but it's still not showing on the scale. I know I've hit another plateau, and that's why I'm upping my game with harder workouts, weight training and an increase in water consumption.

When I think back to where I began on this journey, I can't believe how far I've traveled in such a short amount of time. That doesn't mean I'm 100% satisfied with my progress, and I am definitely impatient to reach my destination. "How much further is it? How many more hours?" I feel like a little kid nagging my parents from the backseat during a long road trip.

Physically and emotionally I'm healthier. In fact, I never expected the dramatic impact an 80 pound weight loss would have on my attitude and outlook on life. I am regaining my confidence, recognizing my personal strength and am enjoying a strong sense of well-being.

My weight loss journey is rather tiresome to my immediate family. No one wants to hear about it anymore, and to be fair I've been warned the topic is hopelessly boring. Apparently talking about exercise is equivalent to discussing daily toiletry habits. Needless to say, I have very little support at home. It makes me sad, but I'm not ready to throw in the towel, yet.

My husband teases me about the running. He finds it ridiculous. I've found that while I'm not the fastest runner it does really help shed the pounds, and my leg muscles are now rock solid. Running is cheap, it makes me feel good and I'm actually starting to like it. Did I just say that? My high school physical education teacher would fall to the floor in a fit of hysterical laughter if he ever read that I actually LIKE running.

I have tried unsuccessfully to get my son, daughter and/or husband to go for a walk, ride bike or hike with me. Frankly, no one in this house is interested. I want to keep moving and losing, but I am beginning to feel really guilty about the time I'm spending exercising. Before I started my focus was always on my family, and my wants and needs usually took a backseat to everyone else's. Now, I take the time to exercise, blog and read. I feel healthier, but my family seems to be drifting apart. The wear and tear is showing.

Am I being selfish? They are content with trotting along the same path, and I'm straining at the bit. I want to run, swim, bike and play. Too busy with their iPads, computers, video games and tv shows I leave them behind. There's a definite disconnect, and it's time we all rewire.


  1. Don't let the family get you down Angie! You are not a bad person for wanting to take care of yourself first! You want be around for them as long as possible, right? Taking care of you is the best way to do that for yourself and your kids.
    I know its challenging but this is YOUR time now! And in the end it will make a difference in your life and well as your family's life too!

  2. In your previous post you mentioned being married for 16 years, so probably for the past 16 years you have not worried about yourself very much at all if you are like every other mom/wife out there! :) This is your time to get healthy and take care of YOU! My husband took a little time to get on board, too. Eventually he did, he does NOT love running, but is now supportive and will go with every once in awhile. While I always thought I WANTED them to join in I kind of realized I enjoyed taking the time for myself.

    P.S. Make sure you are eating enough-you are working out hard and your body may need more fuel to lose the weight, if that makes sense. :)

    1. Thanks, Jen. I have noticed that on days when I work out heavily I do need to eat more. I invite my family to join me, but I pretty much know they're going to opt out. I am also enjoying the time to myself.

  3. Take care of yourself, girl! You are setting a GREAT example of how to care for yourself, and they are all old enough to choose to join you if they're missing time together. You MUST do this for YOU!